Living with BURPS: The Teresa Dimpley Story
By Barbara Barrett
(Some parts of this story are most definitely autobiographical)
Somber
music plays while Ken Burns effect is used to feature images of
squirrels, slippers, sweaters, trees, and people hesitating at
staircases. The music stops as a voice-over introduces the documentary.
Interviewer
(As voice-over)
Good
evening. Welcome to “Who Knew” a documentary series dedicated to
obscure psychological issues. With tonight’s episode we conclude our
first and final season by discussing a syndrome few have heard of, and
even fewer actually live with. To understand the condition we rely
exclusively on research conducted by preeminent self-proclaimed expert
and neurophobiologist Dr. Gerta von Freudenkaputt. She has written
extensively about tonight’s focus — BURPS — Baffling Unstable Recurring
Phobia Syndrome.
Born
in Munich, Germany in 1938 Dr. von Freudenkaputt escaped to Canada with
her family prior to the outbreak of WWII. Her research papers, “Nothing
to Fear But Everything: A Comprehensive Theory of Fear-Based Fear in
Patients with BURPS”, and her follow-up paper, “What Are You So Afraid
Of?” are based on her own experience with BURPS which she has been
researching for over 80 years. She was seven when she began studying her
own symptoms. Her widely misunderstood papers were once cited in a rare
discussion of the syndrome. Known for her unorthodox methods—including
diagnosing patients without actually meeting them—she has united the
psychiatric community—against her.
An obvious edit fades to a blank screen, voice-over stops and a message appears stating;
Dr. von Freudenkaputt currently resides in Eldridgeville, Ontario with her emotional support monkey, Leroy. Neither responded to our request for input.
Voice-over continues;
Our
presentation tonight follows Teresa Dimpley over a short period of
time, capturing her attempts to navigate daily life while contending
with a rotating door of irrational, unpredictable, and sometimes
overlapping phobias.
Teresa’s
condition manifests in two primary categories: deep-rooted, lifelong
fears of squirrels, quicksand and nuclear bombs, in that order, and an
ever changing menu of spontaneous, short-term phobias that may last
hours or just minutes. Some of Teresa’s, in no particular order, random
colours shapes or textures, falling trees, the sound of a phone ringing,
and a fear of falling down stairs.
Through
interviews and candid moments, our documentary aims to provide an
empathetic insight into Teresa’s condition and the lengths to which she
goes to manage her fears.
Music begins again, softly.
Cut to:
Teresa Dimpley sitting in her kitchen. She appears to be alone. The unseen interviewer sits across from her.
Music stops. Teresa and Interviewer are in mid-conversation.
Interviewer
So, you’ve never actually met Dr. von Freudenkaputt?
Teresa
No, but she did give me my diagnosis. She’s very good and knows more about BURPS than anyone.
Interviewer
And how are you feeling today?
Teresa
I’ve been better.
Looking directly into the camera;
I’m sure you’re wondering why I’m dressed like this.
Interviewer
Would you like to explain it. I see you’re wearing several layers of sweaters.
Teresa
I
put on a red sweater this morning. But when I saw myself in the mirror I
realized today is a red phobia kind of day. So I put on the green
sweater but it has a diamond pattern and today I have an issue with that
shape. The blue sweater is okay though.
Interviewer
Couldn’t you remove the first two sweaters?
Teresa
Oh no. Once I put something on, I have a phobia about taking it off.
Looking into camera;
I’m wearing three pairs of sox too.
Interviewer
What do you think will happen if you take off the first sweater?
Teresa
I’m sorry. But Dr. von Freudenkaputt says I shouldn’t feel obliged to explain myself, to anyone.
Voice from next room.
Husband
I
can tell you what will happen. Same as if she puts something on inside
out or backwards, she has to leave it that way. If she changes it, her
day will be ruined.
Teresa
That makes it sound ridiculous.
Interviewer
Actually I don’t think it sounds ridiculous. We all have rituals we practice to get through the day unscathed.
Teresa smiles.
Teresa
Directed towards her husband;
Ah, someone who understands me.
Voice from next room;
Husband
Tell him about your slipper incident.
Teresa
Turning towards the other room and raising her voice;
Now you’re just trying to make me look silly.
Voice from next room;
Son
Aw go on, tell that one. It’s one of my favourites.
Interviewer
Would you like to share the slipper incident?
Teresa
Takes a few moments to decide. Her response is exasperated;
I was go-ing to a very im-port-ant meeting and accidentally walked out of the house in my slippers.
Voice from next room;
Son
Sarcastic tone;
Her very well-worn slippers.
Teresa
Becoming agitated, she raises her voice;
Yes, alright, I left the house in my very well-worn slippers
Tone changes to embarrassed;
and I was afraid to go back and change them so I wore them to the meeting.
Voice from next room;
Son
Continue. Tell him what you did.
Teresa
Becoming agitated, she sighs;
To avoid embarrassment, I walked with a limp so people would think I had a good reason for wearing them.
Directed towards the other room and in a raised voice;
Happy now?
Directed towards the camera and in a softer voice;
Your viewers will think I’m soooo foolish.
Chatter in the next room between husband and son;
Husband
Don’t say anything.
Son
Very quietly;
Viewers will think she’s foolish?
Teresa
excuses herself as she goes off-camera to speak to her husband and son.
She doesn’t realize she’s still mic’d as she has a whispered, but
audible, conversation with the two men.
Teresa
You’re not helping matters. If you can’t say something constructive, please don’t say anything at all.
Now, should I open up about my fear of opening up?
Husband
Only if you feel up to it.
Son
I have nothing constructive to say.
Teresa returns to the interview, unaware her conversation was heard.
Teresa
I just asked my husband to make us a cup of tea.
She looks sheepishly into the camera.
A shadow crosses the room as her husband scurries to the kitchen. Water is heard running as he fills the kettle to make tea.
Teresa
Directed towards the interviewer;
I’m
feeling very uncomfortable about that jacket you’re wearing. I’ll have
to ask you to take it off, or I’ll be wrapping a blanket around you.
Shuffling noise as the interviewer removes his jacket.
Interviewer
Honestly, this jacket kind of bothers me too.
Fade out.
Fade in.
Interview resumes.
Teresa is now wearing oven mitts as she sips her tea.
Interviewer
You look warm, we could take the interview outside.
Camera zooms in showing Teresa is obviously sweating.
Voice from next room;
Husband
She’s used to wearing layers.
Son
She’ll never admit she’s warm. She has a phobia about admitting anything.
Teresa
Raised voice directed towards the next room;
I’m NOT warm.
Softer voice looking into the camera;
I’m fine. Besides, I saw a squirrel out there this morning. Probably best if we stay indoors.
Interviewer
Can you explain your fear of squirrels?
Chatter in next room;
Husband and Son
(In unison)
Oh God!
Teresa
Squirrels
have been my biggest fear since childhood. I believe it stems from
being left in a playpen on the porch as an infant. I’m certain I
remember squirrels climbing in and out as I was left unattended. That’s a
very frightening experience for a baby wouldn’t you say?
Interviewer
Absolutely. I know my mother left me on the porch, it was a pretty common practice.
Teresa
Do you remember the squirrels?
Interviewer
In a serious tone that indicates he’s contemplating the possibility;
Well, I don’t, but I guess, maybe.
Teresa
Squirrels
have been disrupting my life ever since those days alone on the porch.
Like the time, many years ago, my husband and I were sitting in a park
when we heard a rustling sound approaching.
My husband can vouch for this.
From the other room;
Husband
I can indeed. What she’s about to tell you is absolutely true.
Teresa
The
rustling sound startled me and I jumped off the park bench, literally
jumped about ten feet. My husband and I both looked behind us, in the
direction of the sound, only to see a man walking past. Well, we both
started laughing, because we knew what I was thinking. In those days we
could laugh about it. I have to tell you though, that man in the park,
he was offended. He asked, in a very aggressive tone, “Are you laughing
at ME?” “No,” my husband said, “she just thought you were a squirrel.”
Oh the utter embarrassment.
Then
there was another incident. A very traumatic one I must say. We were
enjoying a walk on a residential street, near Casa Loma. There are a lot
of big trees in that neighbourhood and once again we heard a rustling
sound. This time, coming from a tree. We stopped and looked up. And just
as we did, a squirrel dropped out of the tree, and landed spread eagle
right in front of us. If I had been one step closer, I would have been
wearing that squirrel for a hat.
The
shocked animal pulled itself together, stared at us momentarily, then
ran off. I, on the other hand, have never recovered from the shock and
anyone would agree that such an incident would put the fear of squirrels
in St. Francis of Assisi himself. Wouldn’t you agree?
Interviewer
Well, yes I believe I would. I’ve never heard of such a thing. Squirrels don’t usually fall out of trees.
Teresa
Directed to her husband;
It’s true though, isn’t it. It really happened.
From the next room;
Husband
Yes. 100% true. Even I was a little shaken by it.
A
telephone rings. Teresa is obviously startled by it. It’s answered
quickly by her son. He tries to speak quietly and only his end of the
conversation can be heard. Teresa shushes the interviewer indicating she
wants to know who’s on the phone.
Son
Hello.
Oh hi Aunt Sue.
Yeah, she’s doing the interview now.
He laughs.
Oh yeah. Three. And three pairs of sox.
Squirrels? Of course.
And my favourite, the slippers.
He laughs.
For sure. I’ll tell her you called.
Yeah, gotta go.
Teresa
Was that my sister?
Son
It was.
Teresa
She doesn’t understand me either.
Fade out.
Fade in.
Camera
pans room. Teresa is walking past the basement stairs. She stops, then,
looking fearful steps away from the stairs exaggeratedly.
Interviewer
I understand you have a phobia about staircases. Can you explain that?
From the next room.
Quietly, thinking he can’t be heard;
Son
Oh no, she’s gonna tell the subway story.
Teresa
Shouting towards her son;
You weren’t there, you can’t know how frightening it was for me.
Son
Of course I wasn’t there. It happened fifty years ago.
Teresa
Looking into the camera. Dabbing her eyes with a tissue
He’ll never understand. No one understands.
Interviewer
Sympathetically;
I’m beginning to understand.
Teresa
When I was in high school, and yes, I don’t need reminding, that was fifty years ago, but I remember it like it was yesterday.
Quietly, from the next room.
Son
It’s easy to remember like it was yesterday because you told this story, uh — y e s t e r d a y.
Teresa
Sarcastically;
Oh, I’m sorry to bore you with my life story.
Interviewer
I think our viewers would like to learn what caused your stair phobia.
Teresa
I
was only thirteen, in grade nine. I didn’t like to delay on my way
home from school and it was a long commute so I was running down the
stairs at Main Street subway station because I heard the train pulling
in. I fell down the stairs and broke my ankle.
She grins as she looks directly into the camera;
Broken ankle aside, I caught the train.
Interviewer
I’m wondering if all your phobias are based on experiences you’ve lived through.
Teresa
Well,
I’ve never actually found myself stuck in quicksand, or had a tree fall
on me; and I’ve certainly never lived through a nuclear explosion, but
they’re phobias just the same.
Don’t you worry about nuclear war? And what would you do if you fell into quicksand?
Interviewer
I guess I haven’t given these subjects much thought, but I can appreciate your fear, I even understand it.
You’ve got me thinking now. Maybe I’ll give Dr. von Freudenkapput a call, I’m feeling a little uneasy myself about squirrels.
Fade out.
Very good Barbara! Content is great but for me the best is seeing the setup….struggling a little (a lot) actually.
ReplyDeleteGreat Barbara. I have some thoughts but its probably best for us to schedule a meeting, maybe the July one, where all the scripts can be discussed.
ReplyDelete